The Importance of Effective Praise
Every parent knows the importance of praise for kids. But many do not praise their children enough. A study that followed a group of two-year olds around for a day once found that the average child received 432 negative statements and only 32 positive statements every day.
Praise needs to be given to encourage children. Judy H. Wright, Parent Educator, author and international speaker says, “Encouragement is the process of focusing on your children’s assets and strengths in order to build their self-confidence and feelings of worth.”
Through praise we let our children know that we appreciate their efforts not just their accomplishments and that our love and acceptance is not dependent on their behaviour. Praising children encourages them to keep trying. It helps develop confidence and imparts a feeling of being loved, appreciated, and cared for.
Any praise for a kid is good but specific praise is more effective. Ray Burke, Ph.D. and Ron Herron in their award-winning book, ‘Common Sense Parenting’, talk about using ‘effective’ praise. This means using specific praise instead of general comments like ‘Great!’ or ‘Good job!’
Effective praise addresses the action that your child is being praised for. For example, if your child draws a picture, Instead of telling her the picture looks good, try and point out a specific thing that you like; commenting on her use of colour, or the great way she drew herself. This increases her confidence in her drawing ability much more than a general "It’s nice."